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#24227 - 05/06/09 02:08 PM How to be ordained
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
Alright, everyone knows just how easy it is to get ordained a minister in christian religions (just google it and you can find a website where you can do it for free) but how do you get ordained a minister or priest of the CoS?
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#24228 - 05/06/09 02:12 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Diavolo Offline
RIP
stalker


Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 4997
Personally I do think the question is better asked here:

Letters to the Devil

After all, many of them are member of the CoS.

D.

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#24230 - 05/06/09 02:22 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Diavolo]
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
Thank you. I will transfer this over!

EDIT: Damn...that site is blocked for some reason or another...stupid school block program thingys...
ah well, I'll look into some other time.

On the other hand, seeing how this post is already here, does anybody have any ideas?


Edited by ParadiseLost51 (05/06/09 02:24 PM)
Edit Reason: Edit

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#24232 - 05/06/09 02:31 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Bacchae Offline
Satan's White Trash Neighbor
member


Registered: 05/13/08
Posts: 438
Loc: los angeles
you have to JOIN the CoS and be heavily involved in the CoS, and work your way up the social and administrative ladder to become a priest in the CoS.

it is not done through a form you click on a website.

I lost brain cells by even responding to this question.

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#24233 - 05/06/09 02:39 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Dimitri Offline
stalker


Registered: 07/13/08
Posts: 3139
You could try to start your own form of Satanism.. or declare yourself to be "magus/magister/priest/..(Fill in a fancy title)" after starting up a "community" with 10 other members and declare yourself to be a new church once you hit the 20 members...

Now really.. why would you become a satanic priest? What is your motivation? Just want to have some "impressive title" you can show off with? Or is it something else?

I don't really care what your motivation is, but I'm quite sure it's nothing more then ego petting and asskicking in the end..
_________________________
Ut vivat, crescat et floreat

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#24234 - 05/06/09 05:54 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Dimitri]
theblacksheep696 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/11/09
Posts: 7
Loc: scotland
I have to agree with Dimitri,If its a ego boost you need then you'r in the wrong place but why would you want to prove yourself to the CoS,it is better to have self worth and gain knowledge for yourself and be your own person.
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#24239 - 05/07/09 12:33 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
fakepropht Moderator Offline
Big Slick
active member


Registered: 08/29/07
Posts: 990
Loc: Texas
As mentioned already, you need to actually be a member of CoS to begin with. After that, expect a lot of time spent on your knees and buy plenty of lube. Once you have stroked enough egos and worked your way up the ladder, and whored yourself out to the right people, you might be able to set up a Grotto. Once you do, and you pass the test, and grovel a bit more, then you might get the label Priest. I do know a couple of priests in CoS that made it the good old fashioned way. Hard work, spit, and tears. Really, I don't know why you would want to bother with this.
_________________________
Beer, the reason I get up every afternoon.

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#24240 - 05/07/09 12:46 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: fakepropht]
Jake999 Offline
senior member


Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 2230
Having come up "old school," the idea of some one 18-19 years old even considering they have the chops to even consider being a Priest chaps my balls.

But the times, they must've been changing, because it seems that everyone in the Church of Satan these days is a Priest or a Magister, and I have pants older than most of them. Used to be talking to a Priest of the Cjurch of Satan was a rarity. Talking to a Magister was a down right event. And when you DID get to talk to one, they knew what the hell they were talking about.

It all smacks of entitlement vs merit. What the hell have you done to be worthy? What the hell can you contribute, other than wanting to be a Priest. A lot of people want to be astronauts, a lot of people want to be doctors and a lot of people want to be rock stars. Most of them aren't qualified. Scarcity is funny that way.
_________________________
Bury your dead, pick up your weapon and soldier on.


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#24244 - 05/07/09 02:51 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Jake999]
The Zebu Offline
senior member


Registered: 08/08/08
Posts: 1646
Loc: Orlando, FL
I thought the CoS did away with the grotto system some years ago...

As everyone's stated before, you'd have to join the CoS, give them lots of money, and become butt-buddies with the "inner circle" in New York before you'd even be considered to enter the "priesthood". If you're ready to kiss enough ass, I'm sure it's a feasible goal. Just not worth the effort, though, in my opinion.

Clerical titles don't mean dick in occult/neopagan circles. I know a few wiccans/asatru/occultists, and they all call themselves "High Priest/ess, Grand Magisters, and Arcane Wizard Lords (with a high dexterity save and Knowledge:Magic ranks up the ass.)" Personally, I am the Grand High Black Witch-King Magus of the One True Satanic Church of Nobody-Cares(tm).

A "priest" should designate a highly dedicated clerical profession achieved through years of intense study and devotion under a firmly-founded authoritative tradition. As much as I think that Christian priests and ministers are full of crap, I respect them far more than any basement-dwelling clown who demands that everyone call him "Grand High Priest of Satan" simply because he printed out a free clerical certificate online.

Besides, I believe that Satanism should be above such pointless "clerical hierarchy". Tell me this; if Satanism is about being your own God and answering only to yourself, then what the hell do you need a Satanic clergy for in the first place?!? Shepherds are for sheep, not wolves.


Edited by The Zebu (05/07/09 02:52 AM)
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«Recibe, ˇoh Lucifer! la sangre de esta víctima que sacrifico en tu honor.»

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#24245 - 05/07/09 03:02 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: The Zebu]
Jake999 Offline
senior member


Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 2230
Priests of the Church of Satan do not have "flocks." They are not shepherds. They are not the buddy buddy of the "big guy," nor are they some kind of role model or figure of piety for the masses. They are Priests of the Church of Satan, and while I really don't know and couldn't care less what they base their elevation criteria on today, when I was coming up in the Order it was an EARNED title, indicative of not only knowledge, but of potential to assist in the expansion and development of the Church of Satan and its goals.

One thing was certain. If you ASKED for it, it probably wasn't going to come your way.
_________________________
Bury your dead, pick up your weapon and soldier on.


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#24246 - 05/07/09 03:11 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Jake999]
fakepropht Moderator Offline
Big Slick
active member


Registered: 08/29/07
Posts: 990
Loc: Texas
Read, listen, and comprehend what Jake has typed. This is the way that I remember CoS as well. Now days, it's a glad hand group. Suck enough dick, kiss enough ass, and answer yes enough times, without making waves and giving the right answers, and you're in.
_________________________
Beer, the reason I get up every afternoon.

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#24250 - 05/07/09 08:00 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Bacchae]
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
 Originally Posted By: Bacchae
I lost brain cells by even responding to this question.

I appologize for my ignorance, but I just wanted to learn more and get my facts correctly, instead of totally fucking it up. Ignorance is obviously condemned here, but the search for knowledge to end ignorance should be praised!
I said in the first post I know that being a priest was NOT done by internet and that there was much more too it! I understand if you believed I was trying to take the easy way, but I am looking into doing this shit right.

As for the rest of you, I was not implying I wanted to become a priest! I just wanted to know how the process went down. Would I eventually like to be a Priest for the CoS? Yes. Is that a plan I'm going to start on now? No. I just wanted to know more about. My thirst for knowledge often gets the better of me, but it important that my thirst be quenched every so often.
I do thank you for the information.

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#24253 - 05/07/09 09:48 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Octavius Offline
member


Registered: 08/28/07
Posts: 557
Loc: Left the party
Looks like you could use a lesson, young man. Consider this your first and only freebie. Future lessons will cost you some knee-time with me... In all seriousness, this is my personal take on Satanism, but it seems to have been helpful to many noobs here. If it helps you, great. If not, even better.

http://www.the600club.com/topic8445-1.html
_________________________
So long, and thanks for all the fish.

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#24254 - 05/07/09 10:12 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Octavius]
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
 Originally Posted By: Octavius
Looks like you could use a lesson, young man. Consider this your first and only freebie. Future lessons will cost you some knee-time with me... In all seriousness, this is my personal take on Satanism, but it seems to have been helpful to many noobs here. If it helps you, great. If not, even better.

http://www.the600club.com/topic8445-1.html


...I'm not a big fan of knee time...
but thanks for the vid. Very...helpful.

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#24273 - 05/07/09 11:31 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Fist Moderator Offline
veteran member


Registered: 08/31/07
Posts: 1453
Loc: B'mo Cautious MF
Amen Brother Jake! Preach it from the mountain top!

It seems these days every asshat who shops at Hot Topic wants some sort of inflated title.

To answer the young feller's question - why do you want to belong or run any church? Think about it. Why is that important to you? There in lies your answer...
_________________________
I am the Devil and I am here to do the Devil's work.

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#24282 - 05/08/09 10:03 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Fist]
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
 Originally Posted By: Fist
Amen Brother Jake! Preach it from the mountain top!

It seems these days every asshat who shops at Hot Topic wants some sort of inflated title.

To answer the young feller's question - why do you want to belong or run any church? Think about it. Why is that important to you? There in lies your answer...
like i said, I'm not sure, but I just want to get like minded people together. That's it. I don't want power, I just feel like I need one before I go starting things

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#24287 - 05/08/09 01:08 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Diavolo Offline
RIP
stalker


Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 4997
You're a kid; like minded people in your case grow like bananas on a tree. It's not as if you have to join a church or whatever to encounter them, when I go outside now, I can point out about fifty in the next ten minutes.

If you really want to get somewhere, start digging. Dig into knowledge out there, dig into yourself. Realize that at this moment you are a product of society and as such, you are basically worthless. To yourself and to us. Yes I know, you think you are special and that is what society out there tells you; it is ok to be what you are. You are perfect as you are. Being is sufficient. It's the big lie; the attitude you adapt that makes you a nice little bitch fulfilling only their requirements and demands. Yes, they won't disrupt your illusion but nevertheless it is an illusion.

The sooner you realize you are worthless, the faster you can start doing something about it. Calling yourself a satanist, joining churches or aspiring grand titles is not doing something about it. The real work lies else. If I have to explain to you where it lies, I fear you won't find it.

D.

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#24290 - 05/08/09 01:32 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Diavolo]
Dimitri Offline
stalker


Registered: 07/13/08
Posts: 3139
 Quote:
Realize that at this moment you are a product of society and as such, you are basically worthless. To yourself and to us. Yes I know, you think you are special and that is what society out there tells you; it is ok to be what you are. You are perfect as you are. Being is sufficient. It's the big lie; the attitude you adapt that makes you a nice little bitch fulfilling only their requirements and demands. Yes, they won't disrupt your illusion but nevertheless it is an illusion.

The "big sobering up" is when you actually leave school, notice other "special people" also think they are special, start noticing their nothing more then a number trying to evade the little gum I call economy/society from whiping your ass out.

While being at school or with your parents you are under protection. Once it's finished the spanking can begin..

also; being around with like-minded people is but a mere illusion. If we were like-minded I wouldn't disagree with opinions other members have. We simply are different. the only thing that binds us is a common interest... and there it ends.

keep in mind that:


Edited by Dimitri (05/08/09 01:33 PM)
_________________________
Ut vivat, crescat et floreat

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#24442 - 05/11/09 10:46 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Dimitri]
ParadiseLost51 Offline
stranger


Registered: 04/22/09
Posts: 29
Loc: Ohio
All valuable information indeed. I thank you all gratefully.
Perhaps you are all right and that the real work isn't going to start yet and that I need to focus on preparing myself for when it comes.
I thank you all.

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#24501 - 05/12/09 04:30 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
imagodhater Offline
stranger


Registered: 05/11/09
Posts: 7
Loc: Now:Ft Bragg, NC-Soon Germany
Wow, seems to me that no matter how much knee time you don't enjoy you sure seemed to have been getting plenty of ass time during this entire discussion. I swear, I could write a novel on the things that are said in one of these forums. Someone asks a question and as each person responds they feed on each other getting more and more bitchy and anal about their responses. It's like a horror movie where the people doing the tormenting are just down right annoying...makes you want to reach through the screen and rip everyone of their fucking throats out! I'd say...for your sake kid...you'd better research your feeble questions on the web and other resources and come to this site prepared to be a responder not a question asker. People here (and I will most definately be one of them) love ripping into the ignorant so don't be one! I truly love how respectfully evil people can be, if only everyone acted like this we would be a planet of mother-in-laws on the rag 24/7/365 ;-)!
_________________________
Teach me what you think you know, I'll be the judge of whether it's shit or not!

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#85222 - 02/21/14 01:33 PM Re: How to be ordained [Re: imagodhater]
UniversalSatanic Offline
stranger


Registered: 08/29/11
Posts: 23
Loc: Europe
If you want to legally married a Satanic couple or you have a satanic burial.

Ordination could come in handy maybe.

the ULC does ordination on any believe or philosophy


ULC.net
_________________________

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#85234 - 02/22/14 12:24 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: ParadiseLost51]
Michael A.Aquino Offline
stalker


Registered: 09/28/08
Posts: 2575
Loc: San Francisco, CA, USA
This thread raises all sorts of legal questions and technicalities. [It predates my visits to 600C, so I haven't seen it before.]

First, any religious institution does not "do" legal things like marriages. These take effect with the civil government license action. What RIs do is rather to "solemnize" them. Such a ceremony can be signed off by a RI official, or by a justice of the peace in Las Vegas (with Elvis as Best Man, perhaps), by a clerk at city hall, etc. Sometimes such a formalization can then be recorded along with the license. Or the bride & groom can probably arrange to formalize it themselves.

At least back in 1970 in Louisville, KY a RI priest or minister needed a court license to do such soleminzations. This required documentation of ordination in the RI in question, and a statement by the court that the RI p/m was of good moral character, etc. I obtained this license in order to perform Church of Satan marriages in the Nineveh Grotto, and the license is reproduced in my Church of Satan.

Other states/communities were not so formal. Anton solemnized marriages in San Francisco with not needing such a license.

As for the legal standing of Gilmore's "Church of Satan" business today, that is an interesting question. The CoS was incorporated as a nonprofit religion in 1971 (CoS Appendix #156), but never obtained either California or federal tax-exemption as such, and by the mid-80s had clearly violated its Articles by functioning - per Anton's and Diane's sworn court testimony, as a business partnership or sole proprietorship. Subsequent to such testimony, a California Superior Court judge ordered the Church dissolved and its assets split between them - again establishing its status [and now termination] as simply a for-profit business. (CoS Chapter #37). That Densley and Gilmore have continued to update its contact information with the California Secretary of State each year just means that no one had bothered to make a legal issue of this. So the "Church" today is just a private business.

This notwithstanding, the question of its religious authenticity ultimately turns on its beliefs, commitments to/authority from its deity, etc. Thus Judaism and its various Christian spinoffs all believe in JHVH and in his granting of authority to form an RI, ordain clergy, and etc. Things get a little fuzzier in various non/JC RIs like Buddhism & Hinduism, but generally you trace it back to a Big Mommy or Daddy somewhere up/out there. If you don't, then what you really have is just an interpersonal club with a common interest, like the Ferrari Club of America.

So if you want to buy a card in the "Church of Satan" business today, understand first of all that it's a club [since post-1975 it has adamantly denied the existence of Satan]. Then if you have a desire to be a "priest" in it, you'd have to figure out just what that title means, if anything. Normally one is a priest or priestess of a divine being, representing and/or speaking/acting on behalf of same among humanity. If you can't honestly say you're being/doing that, then the title is meaningless. [If you want to try redefining it to other people, go ahead, but be prepared for it to come across as a torturously silly effort to claim an irrelevant dignity.]

In that sense it all comes back to the basic question, previously & periodically kicked about in 600C, as to what "Satanism" is: a metaphysical religion centered around belief in/dedication to a real Satan, or, more commonly today, a type of individualistic hedonism which affects "Satan"/"Satanism" just for spooky glamor. If your Satanism is of this latter type, then as easily as you call yourself a satanist you can call yourself a satanic priest or priestess, or any other title for that matter.
_________________________
Michael A. Aquino

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#87634 - 05/16/14 09:43 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: Michael A.Aquino]
UniversalSatanic Offline
stranger


Registered: 08/29/11
Posts: 23
Loc: Europe
Well marriage in the Netherlands , can only be done by an civil government official.
All other religious and ceremonial marriages are just for the couple themselves.
But none the less important.
_________________________

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#87639 - 05/16/14 11:12 AM Re: How to be ordained [Re: UniversalSatanic]
SIN3 Offline
stalker


Registered: 05/14/13
Posts: 6789
Loc: Virginia
It really depends on each state. For example, in Virginia, the requirements are pretty basic. Technically, I'm a Humanist Minister. If I want to perform a marriage, since I don't have a 'church' or active 'congregation', all I have to do is appear before the Judge to get sworn in. It's a pain in the ass, to take a trip to the court house but I usually don't get any grief over it. It's all just a technicality. This ensures that when I sign the marriage certificate, and the married couple files it with the state it's legitimized.

I've married pagans, Vampires, Satanists, fairies, you name it. I don't do a lot of advertising about it. I'm not in the marriage business. I figure, I can offer an alternative and I'm able. The theatrics can be a lot of fun too.

Out of all the weddings I've done, I'd say the Vampire one was the most fun. All very Gothic and Bram Stoker. It included the bride & groom exchanging blood vows and all that kitschy stuff.

At any rate, every state has a website with marriage requirements. You don't even really need to be ordained if it's a one-time thing. The Ordainment is really if you plan on conducting ceremonies on a regular basis that are typically performed by a clergy person. A private citizen can perform a marriage and even officiate over a memorial. Just check with your state's requirements.

A local gal here was denied as a 'Pagan Priestess' because she failed to meet the state requirements. There was an article about on The Wild Hunt, she was referred to me because I didn't seem to have any trouble and people know I identify as pagan/Satanist. The girl was just daft, so I didn't go out of my way to help her.

The last time I was sworn in along side a Baptist Minister. The judge approved mine but denied his. The reason was (as far as I could tell), he had relocated from North Carolina and did not yet have a Church or Congregation set up in Virginia (it was less than 30 days). The judge meets with you first privately, then in the court room. I'm not sure of the details of their private convo but it must have been enough for her to deny his application. She just asked me some basic questions about my certification and done. Took all of 3 minutes. She didn't even bat an eye-lash at the fact that I was a Satanist about to marry some pagans. heh It was all rather secular.
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SINJONES.com

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