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#30471 - 10/13/09 03:41 AM Did your personality change?
coelentrate Offline
member


Registered: 07/07/08
Posts: 164
Loc: Dundee, Scotland
When you realized you were a Satanist, did it change your personality? If not, did it change the way you talk or act?

I'm reading the Carl Jung book and he says it might. I want to explore that idea here.

I've seen that knowledge can change the way you view the world. That's a start.

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#30472 - 10/13/09 03:49 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: coelentrate]
Jake999 Offline
senior member


Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 2230
No. My personality is pretty much the same as it always was at a base level. I've probably grown a little more cynical over the course of 60 years, but that's probably more of a result of living life than any philosophical construct I might adhere to.
_________________________
Bury your dead, pick up your weapon and soldier on.


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#30473 - 10/13/09 07:16 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: coelentrate]
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
I believe it did a little, if only because I was finally comfortable being in my own skin and embracing the selfish, narcissistic bitch that I can be at times. If there was any change, I believe it was mostly internal, and I feel much happier and self-confident than before.

I also concur with Jake on the cynicism...sometimes it feels as if I've become a little too negative, always finding the black lining in every cloud. I have to remember to keep that in check (or at least keep it to myself), because no one likes hanging out with someone who's a bummer all the time, and I don't want to become that bummer!!! \:\)
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

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#30747 - 10/24/09 08:55 PM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: coelentrate]
Wicked Satanist Offline
member


Registered: 10/23/07
Posts: 244
Loc: Michigan
I'd have to say How could it not?

I remember browing through TSB at my girlfriends house and thinking to myself "i've got to take this home and read it! I borrowed it from here and read it from cover to cover that very night. I felt... enlightened? To coin a cheezy term.

I did start to think of things in a different light and see things from a different view. I was refreshed to read I wasn't the only one in this pathetic world who thought the way I did and saw things from a similar point of view.

I didn't seperate myself from friends or family and become a hermit, but I did limit my exposure to what I had thought was sheepish society and xian dogma. I was hesitant in letting the world know my views, beliefs, and where I stood on the subject.

Today I have no problem what-so-ever letting anyone know I have a different outlook and views and a voice I share too often. Friends have gotten to accept me for this and those who have shy'd away from me and my circle clearly aren't friends anyway.
_________________________
Forever in Darkness,
Timothy

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#30781 - 10/25/09 07:43 PM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: Wicked Satanist]
Night_Shift Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/17/08
Posts: 14
Loc: TN
Did my personality Change? No, after all Satanism is an Ideal not an Identity. but, I will say that I have, Umm, "Grown" has a person since reading the works of Lavey. but my personality is the same, I have always been who I am, everything else is merely aspects of that.
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#30783 - 10/25/09 08:51 PM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: Night_Shift]
TV is God Moderator Offline
Moderator
member


Registered: 08/11/08
Posts: 273
Loc: The Cornhole
I would have to say my attitude at the time changed a bit. Before I felt very frustrated for thinking different from the people around me. I feared I might be an incompatible with a world made for average and mediocre humans. Not to mention I had the irrational emotional insecurity that I'm sure most everyone has at those years.

I bought and read TSB in some curiosity knowing little about it. I expected it to be a good laugh, I had no idea what was really in this book.
When I read TSB it made me realize there was a name for what I was and that it can lead me to success happiness. It didn't change my views and ideas as much as much as seeing them as a positive thing. In this way I think reading TSB was a major step in my maturity and self-confidence.

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#30802 - 10/26/09 04:11 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: TV is God]
ThinkingCap Offline
stranger


Registered: 09/11/09
Posts: 11
Loc: Tennessee
Placing a name to my general views of the world didn't radically change my personality, I was much the same person before reading TSB as I was afterwards, but my thought processes did change. I became far more analytical in everything and began reading a lot more. I had read a lot beforehand, but now I was more interested in reading books that had actual substance. It was like the more I read on Satanism, the more confident I was in my own opinions and the desperate need to form my thoughts from credible research. No school could ever dream of teaching me that.

Whether that realization was just a side-effect from reading the mostly-intelligent posts here or from recognizing the importance of improving my own intellect to become a better individual for myself, I can't be sure. Either way I know I won't be turning back. It feels good to know that I am inherently better than the majority of the people around me because of my will to form honest opinions, instead of blind ones. I do talk less now though, too busy thinking or staying quiet for my own well-being. My parents don't take well to my questioning attitude and I'd rather stay on their good side.

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#30804 - 10/26/09 10:43 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: ThinkingCap]
Nyte Offline
member


Registered: 10/19/09
Posts: 380
Loc: Ohio
I wouldn't say my personality changed as much as my emotional and mind set changed. It took me quite a while to accept that the guilt I had been feeling for years was needless and so engrained through what was someone else's set of beliefs. Those set of beliefs didn't work for me, no matter how hard I tried believe or vary them. Even that left me feeling guilty. It took me quite a while to accept my own "skin" and understand that I could let go of all the extra baggage without feeling guilty about anything pertaining to what I was and what I believed.

I think the way my personality has changed is that I am a bit more intolerant of the local religious salesmen or idiots in general and less tolerant of people encroaching on my goodwill for myself and those I love. I've always been loyal to those in my life but have found that I am more protective than before. Probably more so now because I've come to realize that I choose carefully those that are very close and know that they are not just "tossed" into the mix of my life by some old guy in the sky. I've found that those who don't affect my life directly aren't allowed any real "stay power" for or over me and this can/does include family. Friends are chosen very carefully. I don't fret the small stuff any more, either. If something affects someone else then it is theirs to own and I no longer let their little problems run amuck over me. Eh, maybe there's more "changes" than I thought but all in all, those that know me say I haven't changed over the years. Although, many don't know the internal struggles I went through to get to where I am either. So, some things haven't changed no matter what, such as my privacy.

Perhaps, intensify my personality is a much better assessment, rather than change. For me, it was about coming into "my own", rather than making huge changes. Realization, awareness and an awakening in what was already known, yet hadn't been explored. Decisions are made much more calculated with more knowledge instead of allowing things to "just happen". Loyalty placed where it is deserved and enjoyment of what life has to offer and those around me brought to surface more freely. Many of these personality traits were always within me, but became more important and open when there wasn't anyone else to be accountable for them, except me.

And YES, there was quite a bit of self indulgence of desires that were held captive for quite a few years when I first discovered Satanism but I think many go through that part of their own discovery as well.
_________________________
If only just for today.....

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#30807 - 10/26/09 11:29 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: coelentrate]
BelialsGal Offline
stranger


Registered: 08/30/09
Posts: 43
Loc: Tulsa, OK
My personality did not change after realizing I was a satanist. I am still a gentle cynic who loves socializing almost as much as I love myself.

There has been some change though.

Instead of using obscenities when frustrated at something or someone, I now call upon the demons of the infernal abyss and ask that they might strike down thine enemy. That of course, is accompanied by a theatrical shaking of my fist (it demonstrates the seriousness of the matter) ;).

So, with regards to a change in my actions or the way I speak, yes, there has been a dramatic change. I censor myself less and laugh at myself more.

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#30834 - 10/27/09 04:11 AM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: BelialsGal]
Miss May Offline
pledge


Registered: 09/27/09
Posts: 66
Loc: sebastopol, CA
I became more sure of myself and I stopped feeling like I had to change. I realized that who I am is a gift.
My personality became less of a mainstream mask.

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#31622 - 11/13/09 02:46 AM Re: Did Your Personality Change? [Re: coelentrate]
nocTifer Offline
pledge


Registered: 11/07/09
Posts: 87
Loc: Khazakstan
when i activated my Satanity, it did not change my personality. it had changed fully 5 years prior, at my Saturn Return. my pact in its aftermath was a punctuated refinement as i settled into proper relation to my local culture (liberal and post-Christian), and into a compassionate, outrageous activism.

knowledge about Satan and Satanism sealed my relationship with my society, and with the Northwest Forest bioregion of my birth. the incentive i had in forging my pact drew from a study of the history of personifications of evil through time (demonology) and an examination of social studies by Hicks (1991), Bromley (1991), Lanning (1992), and later, Ellis (2003), and others debunking the fabrications of the anti-cultist and anti-satanist witch hunters, along with their false memory syndromes and rumour-panic subversion ideologies. my pact's form and inspiration were a reflection of legend and lore particular to Faust.

LaVey was my fundamental source on *religious* Satanism, to whose text and interviews i returned repeatedly, due to his influence on social groups and those whose Satanic careers i tried to understand and contrast with the lies and slanders promoted by police seminar 'educators'. I also valued the fanciful constructions of Jules Michelet, the dictionary of Wade Baskin, and the post-LaVeyan expression of Jeffrey Deboo.

it was during or around this time of assimilation of knowledge that i began to change my speech and action, and this led to a shift in my social connections. I constructed theories about martyrdom and its relation to the New Religious Movement sects (Witches, Satanists, Sorcerers, et al) as they seemed related to the history and development of at least early Christianity, to which they compared favourably and from which they appeared to descend, and i recognized the controversy that the "martyrdom" featured in these theories would stir.

I found a helpful social vehicle in pursuit of the application of these ideas toward ecological-activism and sustainable martyring expression: becoming the Satanic Outreach Director for the Church of Euthanasia. shortly afterward, i concluded my pact (96/6/6), and started promoting, alongside as many other Satanism FAQs as i could collect together, the concept of the Great Martyrdom Cult as i conceived it. Manifesto Satanika and the Gospel of Satan i wrote during this period also, though i did not then delve very deeply into their importance.

I began acting on my pact with Satan as i understood Hir, and this included a defense of the character of those who were unfairly targetted by Christians and the wider community they were influencing, especially demons, Satan, Satanists, diabolists, demonolaters, Witches, Sorcerers, magicians, and occultists, all during the Satanism Scare that was ramping up in the 1990s. I also defended the character and symbol of Satan in public ('witnessing', as i understood it), as well as pointed out what i had identified as the reality behind Satan (natural phenomena outside human control; wild nature, both internal and external).

in my apparel, i retained the black robes i had already adopted in pursuit of quasi-monastic standards, but embellished these with demonic and Satanic amulets. my witnessing primarily extended to occultists and Neopagans, for whom i networked data, and whom i loved and respected greatly. I informed them of the Good News regarding demonology: that the 'satanic ritual abuse' and 'occult crime' nightmares of our society weren't real, and that my experience of demons -- i was actively invoking them during that period -- was that they were *wild natural beings*, energies or intelligences that were not described accurately by Christian religious and Hermetic mages who thought them to be "evil" and portrayed them as forming grand martial hierarchies. I suggested that they ought be approached with care as one might any sizable wild animal

knowledge did change the way that i viewed the world, and it also changed the way that i related to it, and how i behaved within it given the circumstances. this knowledge was moreso a clear-sightedness regarding projected subversion nightmares and egregious accusatory slanders, rather than some doctrinal truth i found in essays by Satanists. these essays i gathered for archival and showcasing, and developed my own alongside them by which i felt more strongly inspired. I'm continuing to pursue that knowledge and reflect it to the public, and these are the most pertinent compositions toward this end:

http://www.satanservice.org/real-satanists.html
http://www.satanservice.org/covens.html
http://www.satanservice.org/satanism-bibliography.html
_________________________
Troll Towelhead, Grand Mufti of Satanism
http://www.facebook.com/Tr0llT0welhead
http://www.gospel-of-satan.com

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#31633 - 11/13/09 07:10 AM Re: Did Your Personality Change? [Re: nocTifer]
Satansfarm Offline
member


Registered: 01/12/08
Posts: 352
Loc: america
I was raised to be a good little brown nosed Catholic. Around the time I was ten years old, I began to question the validity of the beliefs that I was force fed as a child. When I first read the Satanic Bible, I felt that many of my underlying feelings had been confirmed. I had long felt that there was something amiss with the way I was raised. It seemed counter to my true nature. This second guessing stuff just had to go. For the longest time I struggled with the feelings of guilt that Christianity instilled in me. Satanism really was the first thing that said to me, "Hey, look, kid, you are ok. There's nothing wrong with the way you feel, or about the things that you do because they feel ok to you. The religionists had me agonizing over masturbating, which is something everybody does, or even defending myself when someone was trying to beat me up. Revenge is mine, sayeth the lord, or turn the other cheek just didn't cut it when I'm getting my head pounded in by some bully.
So, yes, I have changed. I am self empowered. No more meek little cowering slave shivering in a puddle of my own piss.

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#33164 - 12/23/09 02:33 PM Re: Did Your Personality Change? [Re: Satansfarm]
William Wright Offline
active member


Registered: 10/25/09
Posts: 862
Loc: Nashville
I think Iíve become a more pleasant person since recognizing and then accepting who Iíve been all along. Iím less inclined to argue over petty things like religious differences, because Iím OK with who I am and donít feel the need to justify it to others. I donít care if others agree with me. I can get along with anyone as long as they donít fuck with me.

Iím sure my enhanced self confidence shows in my personality. I still make plenty of mistakes, but instead of wandering out of them into more mistakes I find a lesson to be learned and move forward with a greater sense of awareness.

I feel good about myself. Itís nice to know that I donít have to prove myself to anybody, because ultimately it doesnít matter what they think of me but only what I think of myself. That is true freedom Ė not freedom as defined by governments or the masses but freedom of spirit.
_________________________
In Minecraft all chickens are spies.

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#33177 - 12/23/09 08:32 PM Re: Did Your Personality Change? [Re: William Wright]
Diavolo Offline
RIP
stalker


Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 4997
Of course my personality changed. To be honest, I spit on those people that discovered they're a Satanist and since they're are all happy and satisfied about themselves as if the discovery of being this "end and all" of things implies they reached some kind of an end-goal. To me personality is nothing but a temporal fixation in long road of self-discovery. You explore your weakness, your fears, your vulnerabilities and add them to your knowledge base, realizing that being weak isn't too much different from anything else, just another position in a self-perceived reality. In the end, there's so much being cool and strong attached to Satanism that if you prod your finger in a soft spot, most their personality pops like a balloon. Vama Marga babies, all that scares the bunnies is open territory to others.

D.

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#33406 - 12/30/09 08:50 PM Re: Did your personality change? [Re: coelentrate]
Fist Moderator Offline
veteran member


Registered: 08/31/07
Posts: 1453
Loc: B'mo Cautious MF
Satanists are born - not made. You were a Satanist long before you ever read TSB. The true Satanist knows he is not like the great mass of humanity. After reading TSB he has a Eureka moment where it all now makes sense and his true name is revealed. From that point on the Satanist lives in the image of his true self.
_________________________
I am the Devil and I am here to do the Devil's work.

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