Page 1 of 3 123>
Topic Options
#32393 - 11/29/09 08:23 PM 'Tis the season to be blasphemous
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
I start getting nauseated the minute stores start stocking Christmas decor. These days, they don't even wait until after Thanksgiving Day. To counteract this annual misery, I like to put up some "alternative" decorations. Inspired a couple of years ago by Morgan's full sized black Christmas tree, I had found a small red tabletop pre-lit Xmas tree at Target. I found a nifty red wired star to invert and place atop it, and I added some Demon-sigil painted mini balls. It looked great.

But I got a little bored with it, and after finding a better looking mini black tree at Borders of all places, I wanted to kick up my blasphemy a notch. So, aside from getting a new tree, I plan on making the most offensive nativity scene imaginable. I'll be keeping it inside, as I don't want my house being vandalized, but be assured, there will bestiality and some sacrificial slaughter involved. I just need to find a cheap nativity manger scene at Target, throw away the figurines that come with it, and put in Dominatrix Virgin Mary getting eaten out by a Wise Man.

Hell, I might as well have fun with this fucking Capitalist free-for-all they call a "holiday".
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

Top
#32394 - 11/29/09 08:28 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
CJB Offline
member


Registered: 10/12/09
Posts: 125
Loc: Virginia Beach, VA
...do be so kind as to take pictures.

I typically don't decorate (the one year I actually bought a tree for my friends to throw presents under, it was a two dollar plastic six inch tree. You hit a button and it lit up!), but this year I might. Kinda been something I wanted to do since seeing the Critter Christmas South Park episode...

-CJ
Yay! Blood orgy!

Top
#32396 - 11/29/09 08:52 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
MatthewJ1
Unregistered



To Dear Nemesis,

That proposed nativity scene of yours is truly beautiful and worthy and made me feel all soft and sentimental inside.

I would like to do something similar this Christmas in order to honour Jesus and his birth, but I just don't know if I can top your idea.

At this stage I want to either do one of the following:

1.Build a machine which force feeds people turkey and ham etc. and then find a Christian brother and strap him into the machine and force feed him until he explodes. This performance would be accompanied by Bing Crosby's Christmas Carols in the background.

2. Creating my own android Santa, complete with its own biological, chemical and conventional weapons and let it loose inside a large crowded shopping mall so it can do its thing.

3. Contact Dr. Phibes and ask if he can bring back the real Jesus and then program the Jesus to preach the power of orgies and other sinful things.

If Phibes cannot do it then Phibes should murder all of the Christians one by one via the use of animals and things.

Anyway Dear Nemesis your example has inspired me and I hope that my final choice is worthy in your eyes.

Top
#32398 - 11/29/09 09:20 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
6Satan6Archist6 Offline
stalker


Registered: 10/16/08
Posts: 2509
You could always do a scene of Mary getting gangbanged by the wisemen. Some well placed Elmer's Glue will help to complete the look.

PS: I just ordered my first shirt from the Arrogant Atheist website. I'm so excited! \:D
_________________________
No gods. No masters.

Top
#32399 - 11/29/09 09:25 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: ]
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
Well, it's currently very un-PC to criticize or make fun of Islam, and we've all seen when outsiders blaspheme Muhammad (Peace Be Upon Him--lol). So maybe start branching out to include that tyrannical faith as well.
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

Top
#32400 - 11/29/09 09:28 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: 6Satan6Archist6]
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
I considered that scenario...I'm not sure what I'll be doing until I actually get the dolls and come up with some little costumes to dress them in. I might have Mary sucking a Wise Man's cock and getting nailed by the manger donkey. I can make the penises out of Fimo clay and glue them on \:\) I'd really like to find a large enough plastic goat, so I can cut it's head off and glue it to a Ken's body, then have it sacrificing Baby Jesus over the orgy scene.
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

Top
#32404 - 11/29/09 11:08 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
MatthewJ1
Unregistered



Yes I think its important to be able to multi - task in this hurly burly world and branching out is important.

Yes those bandits in bedsheets have had their day!

I have to admit I am a touch uncertain on how to proceed.

I am thinking of creating a 1,000 foot high Salman Rushdie and sending him out to do battle with those towelhead infidels.

That'll learn em!

Or I could send Cat Stevens to bore them to death. (Oops sorry to all those Cat fans.)

I have to admit I am a bit stumped.

Top
#32406 - 11/30/09 12:03 AM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: ]
Morgan Offline
Princess of Hell
stalker


Registered: 08/29/07
Posts: 2956
Loc: New York City
Nemesis, I love you.

You make me smile, and feel all warm and tingly inside.
With your thoughts of holiday blood orgy bits.

Perhaphs you could do the 3 wise men as half naked muslims, in that famous pyramid pose? With the gifts coming out of their asses?

Enjoy, create, but please, please post photos. \:\)

Morg
_________________________
Courage Conquering Fear
Fuck em if they can't take a joke
Don't Like What I Say, Kiss My Ass



Top
#32408 - 11/30/09 01:25 AM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Morgan]
MatthewJ1
Unregistered



Awwww the posts in this thread make me think of lil bunnies and fluffy ducklings and Koala’s and all manner of sweet things.

And who could forget those lovely emails you may sometimes get where little orphaned kittens are being raised by full grown pit bulls and orphaned puppies by pandas etc.

I am sure that those outrageous turkeys, such as the towel head infidels and the Christian evangelical ratbags would agree with me on this.

Preach the word powerfully by sending your ideas to the king of the glowing and glassy eyed Christian cult leaders Kip McKean and any other weirdos you can think of.

Why not share with the whole world.

Yes! The pyramid is a wonderful idea and photos of it should be on all the Hallmark Christmas cards at the very least!

Hell! It’s going to be a great Christmas! All I have to do is pay for the whole thing now.

P.S. I have decided to go with the Dr. Phibes thing.

Phibes is the only one I can trust with a job like this, as he is the only one who really knows how to take care of business.

Top
#32572 - 12/05/09 10:12 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
BFranklin Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/27/09
Posts: 33
Loc: Boston
What about Channukah?

I recently saw some sculpted candles in the form of erect dicks...anatomically perfect and to scale (and I don't want to know how they got the mold)...not an uncommon item I suppose, but rife with possibilities. It got me thinking...if you want to immolate Channukah properly as well, you could take seven of these phalus - candles...and...well, I'll leave it to your obviously vivid immagination.

(P.S. the candles ARE circumcized)
_________________________
"Democracy is 2 wolves and a lamb deciding what to eat. Liberty is a well-armed lamb"
-B Franklin

Top
#32576 - 12/06/09 03:44 AM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
Michael A.Aquino Offline
stalker


Registered: 09/28/08
Posts: 2573
Loc: San Francisco, CA, USA
YULE HORROR
- by H.P. Lovecraft
December 1926

There is snow on the ground,
And the valleys are cold,
And a midnight profound
Blackly squats o'er the wold,
But a light on the hilltops half-seen hints of feastings unhallowed and old.

There is death in the clouds,
There is fear in the night,
For the dead in their shrouds
Hail the Sun's turning flight,
And chant wild in the woods as they dance round a Yule-altar fungous and white.

To no gale of Earth's kind
Sways the forest of oak,
Where the sick boughs entwined
By mad mistletoes choke,
For these pow'rs are the pow'rs of the dark, from the graves of the lost Druid-folk.

Top
#32591 - 12/06/09 05:18 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Michael A.Aquino]
GillesdeRais Offline
member


Registered: 09/08/09
Posts: 141
'Tis a grove-circled dwelling
Set close to a hill,
Where the branches are telling
Strange legends of ill;
Over timbers so old
That they breathe of the dead,
Crawl the vines, green and cold,
By strange nourishment fed;
And no man knows the juices they suck from the depths of their dank slimy bed.
In the gardens are growing
Tall blossoms and fair,
Each pallid bloom throwing
Perfume on the air;
But the afternoon sun
with its shining red rays
Makes the picture loom dun
On the curious gaze,
And above the sween scent of the the blossoms rise odours of numberless days.
The rank grasses are waving
On terrace and lawn,
Dim memories savouring
Of things that have gone;
The stones of the walks
Are encrusted and wet,
And a strange spirit stalks
When the red sun has set.
And the soul of the watcher is fill'd with faint pictures he fain would forget.
It was in the hot Junetime
I stood by that scene,
When the gold rays of noontime
Beat bright on the green.
But I shiver'd with cold,
Groping feebly for light,
As a picture unroll'd -
And my age-spanning sight
Saw the time I had been there before flash like fulgury out of the night.

I, too, can quoth HP. ;\)
_________________________
Philosophy, n. A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.

Top
#32594 - 12/06/09 05:40 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: GillesdeRais]
Morgan Offline
Princess of Hell
stalker


Registered: 08/29/07
Posts: 2956
Loc: New York City
Hi,
Came across this last night/this morning.
If after everything, it still doesn't show up, please can someone make it show for me.

Thank you,
Morgan

ps.
The lyrics really fit in here too.

Worst Fuck (music video)



Edited by Nemesis (12/06/09 06:15 PM)
_________________________
Courage Conquering Fear
Fuck em if they can't take a joke
Don't Like What I Say, Kiss My Ass



Top
#32595 - 12/06/09 06:15 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Morgan]
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

Top
#32602 - 12/06/09 10:17 PM Re: 'Tis the season to be blasphemous [Re: Nemesis]
William Wright Offline
active member


Registered: 10/25/09
Posts: 862
Loc: Nashville
All right, I know I'm going against the grain on this one but oh well…

I work part-time at a retail store, and although I don’t believe in the virgin birth any more than I believe in Santa, I find myself annoyed that no “Christian” Christmas songs are played over the loud speaker. I sense that censorship is at work, and I HATE censorship. Furthermore, I have to admit that there’s something about “Silent Night” that I find peaceful, and there’s something about “Joy to the World” that makes me happy.

Bring out the Pentagram on Christmas, let the wise men gangbang Mary and celebrate everything else “sacrilegious”. But don’t leave out the traditional stuff, as corny as it might be. It's about more, not less.
_________________________
In Minecraft all chickens are spies.

Top
Page 1 of 3 123>


Moderator:  Woland, TV is God, fakepropht, SkaffenAmtiskaw, Asmedious, Fist 
Hop to:

Generated in 0.026 seconds of which 0.001 seconds were spent on 28 queries. Zlib compression disabled.