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#3279 - 01/09/08 11:25 PM politically corrected jokes.
L Fern Tej Offline
pledge


Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 65
Loc: Las Vegas, NV. (u.s.)
me and some people down at /b/ took the liberty of replacing politically incorrect joke punchlines with more appropriate realistic ideas.
that i thought i'd share

and yes, we were joking.


A Muslim cleric, a rabbi, and a priest walk into a bar.
They have an enlightening discussion and each leaves with a heightened sense of respect for the others' beliefs.

Why don't blacks like their kids marrying Mexicans?
Because after 300 years of suppression and slavery, unity is very important to the African American community.


what's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
The holocaust


Knock knock.
Who's there?
Somebody who requires your attention.


Knock Knock
Who's there?
The pizza you ordered
oh, ok, hold on while I get your money.

What does Chuck Norris keep behind his beard?
Most likely a patch of skin perforated with small hair follicles.

What do you get when you cross a chainsaw with a pistol?
A largely impractical close-combat weapon with very little marketing potential.


how do you blind-fold a chinese man?
you fold a relatively square piece of fabric about 3 or 4 times, or until light no longer emits through the other side then you tie it around his eyes...
but you have to tie it reaaaaaal tight because we all know how sneaky those damn chinese are... when it comes to being an all around great culture.


what do u get when u put a baby in a blender?
From recent court cases, 12 to 15 years



Your momma's so black that people are often astonished by the pristine ebony hue of her skin.



Your momma's so fat, when she fell into the Grand Canyon, her excess weight caused her to strike the ground with force greater than that of an average-sized individual.



Why did the black man steal from the grocery store?
His family was hungry and due to being laid off from his job he was forced into a situation that he neither deserves or enjoys. I hope he gets back on his feet soon.


A car with 3 Niggers goes of a cliff and they all die. What's the bad news?
They were all good friends of mine.


why do mexicans hang out in front of home depots?
because they're very hard working, opportunity seeking individuals who stride to give there family lower-middle class life which would of otherwise been impossible in mexcio.


What did the Amish man say to the black lawyer?
Probably something appropriate to the situation.



A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Imam all get on a bus at the same stop.
They enjoy a peaceful ride through the city, and get off at their respective stops.


There once was a man from Nantucket. He is a hard working, middle class, all-American citizen with two kids and a beautiful wife. The next spring, they will hopefully be blessed with a third child. He and his wife have good genes, so I have no qualms that the baby will be born healthy. I believe this man is a very lucky man indeed.


Why do black people have nice clothes and nice cars, but not nice houses?
Because racism exists in real estate as well.



Why did the chicken cross the road?
It may have seen something that it would like to eat on the other side of the road, or perhaps it was surprised and scurried away as we all know chickens are easily frightened.



An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk.
The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey.



Why are asian people so good at math?
Because they study hard.




Did you hear about the overweight cop who got shot during a shootout at a donut shop?
I just wondered if you would be able to provide any news articles on the incident, as I require further information on such a tragic event.



What do you call 4 Mexicans in a leaky boat?
A good reason to call the Coast Guard.

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#3281 - 01/10/08 12:18 AM Re: politically corrected jokes. [Re: L Fern Tej]
rob_church Offline
member


Registered: 11/02/07
Posts: 194
Loc: alberta , canada
thats all fine and good but humour comes from conflict,or others pain ,some times your own pain,that is why politically incorrect jokes are funny in the first place.
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#3511 - 01/15/08 11:48 PM Re: politically corrected jokes. [Re: rob_church]
Veldrin Offline
pledge


Registered: 10/04/07
Posts: 55
Loc: Melbourne, Australia.
Incorrect rob. While I do admit that conflict and...tragic circumstances can prove amusing to an extent.
A lot of humor, especially the examples (well...some of them anyway) listed here are funny because of the wordplay.

It's like comparing the comedic values of frasier against those of southpark.
Sure both have thier moments, but they are distinctly different styles and methods of humor.

If *all* that can make you laugh is pain, then you are probably not well mentally balanced and should seek therapy right away.

That being said, I do find black humor to be funny as long as the comedians involved actually know what they are doing.

It's all about the skill of the person trying to be funny.

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#3523 - 01/16/08 03:58 AM Re: politically corrected jokes. [Re: Veldrin]
TornadoCreator Offline
member


Registered: 10/24/07
Posts: 586
Loc: No Fixed Address
I found these extremely funny, thank you for sharing... and shame on you, rules 1 & 2.
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If you can't practice what you preach, at least have the decency to preach what you practice

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#3538 - 01/17/08 01:38 AM Re: politically corrected jokes. [Re: L Fern Tej]
Knothead Offline
stranger


Registered: 12/30/07
Posts: 11
I actually liked a few of these:
 Quote:
what do u get when u put a baby in a blender?
From recent court cases, 12 to 15 years

Your momma's so fat, when she fell into the Grand Canyon, her excess weight caused her to strike the ground with force greater than that of an average-sized individual.

What do you call 4 Mexicans in a leaky boat?
A good reason to call the Coast Guard.

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#3857 - 02/05/08 01:23 PM Re: politically corrected jokes. [Re: Knothead]
DistroyA Offline
member


Registered: 02/04/08
Posts: 478
Loc: Mansfield, Nottinghamshire, UK
The only one that made me laugh heartily was the grand canyon one.

The rest were a bit too nice and sincere. That's just my opinion and sense of humour I guess...
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"A man chooses, a slave obeys." - Andrew Ryan of Ryan Industries (Bioshock)

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