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#38414 - 05/10/10 05:18 AM Demonic possession
mmatraus Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 13
Loc: Tennessee
A member recently contacted me stating that due to my age I would have experiences that others not as old as I might be interested in. I am not a person who openly discusses my life in a forum such as this but I thought you might find this interesting and I would be interested in reading any feed back I might get from it.
Many years ago after going through a divorce I moved back to my home town. The divorce had not been easy for me and had almost cost me my sanity in the form of a nervous breakdown. It was not long after returning home that my brother and his wife separated and divorced. At the time I thought how in the hell did he stay with her as long as he did. Although I had always seen her as some kind of Goddess I also thought that she was nothing but a whore who was openly unfaithfull to my brother.She was also a proclaimed witch who he come home and found in a satanic trance that he was almost unable to bring her out of. It was after this that they dissposed of all the satanic material she had. The divorce was not long after this.
I saw her several times after the divorce, we talked, and I was friendly towards her and I am sure my need to have a woman showed in some way because I seemed to be running into her more and more so I am sure she knew my daily schedule. One Saturday morning I was puttering around cleaning the mobile home I had bought from my dad with the door open and she walked in on me. After the greeting she sat down at the table and I poured her a cup of coffee as she lit a cigarette. She was dressed in black and looked stunning as usual. I think my need became a little to much for me to handle and a relationship started forming. One that seemed almost as though it was always meant to happen but could not until this moment.
Needless to say we went out that night for dinner and the involvment that took place during dinner was not one that usually happens so quickly between a man and a woman. The sex I enjoyed that night and many other nights seemed to be of a rutual nature to her and slowly drew me into it also. The most unusual thing for me to withstand was that she liked to bite. I don't mean nip at me but bite until she drew blood. She would then lick at the blood enjoying enjoyin herself completely in a world of her own as thought I was nothing more then prey for her to do as she wished.
Another ritual she had was to have me before her on my knees as she instructed me to be very still and show no emotion no matter what she would do. It was hard at first because she would turn me on to no end and I wanted to respond but the one time I did it turned her off and she went home. I never let that happen again and played my part to the hilt wanting the release I knew was waiting when it was over. I would kneel as she would brush her lips against mine knowing that I wanted to kiss them so bad. It was as hard to resist as when she would brush her breast against my lips and body tantalizing me till I couldn't even think straight.
One night she informed me that she had a date with a guy that she had meant at the grocery store and that she would not see me that weekend. I knew the person she was talking about he worked in the meat departmen and was kind of far out from most peoples standards so to speak but she said she found him interesting. I was hurt and I showe it but it didn't seem to phase her in the least. I thought "just the way she did my brother" and I expressed that feeling speaking far to quickly.
She was not the kind to argue thinking she was to far superior to argue with someone not on that same level with her. I guess I showed myself to stongly to her and I could see a change come over her like someone who wanted to really loose it but kept thier cool instead. I tried the macho approach telling her that I would not be around for her like my brother was for years for just when she wanted to play with me.
She had deep dark eyes and I watched them as they glared at me and became like black marbles as her features changed and I was looking into the face of a demonic demon not only did her facial feature change but also her body. It lasted for only seconds but it impressed a feeling of fear and possession in me that has lasted for many years.
She married the man from the grocery store but it did not keep her from coming around to enjoy herself with me and altough the rituals became more intense never again did she have to show herself as she did that night and as time went on she replaced all of the satanic material that had been taken from her and then some.
She passed away from cancer several years ago but I have felt no release from her hold on me even in death.

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#38423 - 05/10/10 12:43 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: mmatraus]
William Wright Offline
active member


Registered: 10/25/09
Posts: 863
Loc: Nashville
Mmatraus, although I agree with MawhrinSkel that it is an interesting story and could possibly be expanded into a novel or feature-length screenplay, I suspect that the story has every bit as much to do with your imagination as with what really happened. The woman clearly relished her role as witch/vampire/whore, and it sounds like you got a perverse kick out of it yourself.

As for “demonic possession”, I think the only demons involved were the ones you created. Perhaps deep down you want to think of yourself as possessed by her “demons”, by her essence. Maybe that’s your way of holding onto an obviously fascinating woman. If you don’t want to be “possessed”, then simply let go. Ultimately you are in control of that space between your ears. It’s all on you.
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#38426 - 05/10/10 03:32 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: William Wright]
mmatraus Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 13
Loc: Tennessee
I would have thought it my imagination also had it not been for the satanic trance she had been found in sometime earlier and the wine we had both drank that night. You would have had to known the woman to get the full concept of her personality to say the least she was strange although beautiful in every way. The story was not meant to be one that could have been made into a nobel or movie but now that you mention it I can see where there would be that possibility. What I wrote only goes along with other strange happenings and predictions surrounding her over the years. I know what I saw, I know it scared the hell out of me, and I know that since she has always been with me in form or another even though my life has moved on.
One such happening was my youngest step son seeing a young girl with her a girl that had been killed in a car accident that he could have never known or seen before in his life. It was proven through pictures that he did actually see her picking her out of an individual picture scattered amongst several with her sisters the same age. The first picture he chose he said she was not wearing the clothes she had on when he saw her so they found one that did and he said "that's her." It was the clothes she was buried in.

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#38430 - 05/10/10 06:32 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: mmatraus]
6Satan6Archist6 Offline
stalker


Registered: 10/16/08
Posts: 2509
First: What exactly is a "satanic trance"?

Second: Why would ghosts be wearing clothes and why would it be the clothes they were buried in and not the clothes they died in?
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No gods. No masters.

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#38431 - 05/10/10 07:00 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: 6Satan6Archist6]
mmatraus Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 13
Loc: Tennessee
Just where do you think they would change and I doubt very much that they would go to J.C,Pennys to shop for new ones. I believe it was so that she would be recognizable to any human who would see her. This happened long after my affair with the young girls aunt and after I married my second wife and the girl had been gone for a good while before I remarried to a woman who lived many miles from me and could not have possibly known the family until we were married. I'm not asking you to believe any of it I just wrote an unusual happening in my life that in our believes I thought you all might find interesting and it's not like it hasn't happened to other people.
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#38432 - 05/10/10 07:05 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: 6Satan6Archist6]
mmatraus Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 13
Loc: Tennessee
I'm sorry I didn't see your first question until I backed out of my reply to your second question.
I called it a satanic trance for lack of a better term to call it but the woman had been trying to summon demons prior to being found completely out of it and almost unable to revive and after a physical exam by a doctor they found nothing to show why she was in suck a state other then the ritual she had been performing. I can't explain it I just tell it the way it was.

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#38435 - 05/10/10 09:50 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: mmatraus]
Mordred Offline
stranger


Registered: 05/03/10
Posts: 25
mmatraus, I sympathize and I'm sorry for your loss. Losing someone special to you is traumatic, even years later.

However, I'm not really sure what is it you saw, or think you saw, but it is certainly not normal. I think you should really be talking about this to a professional.
_________________________
"That which can be asserted without evidence, can be dismissed without evidence" - Hitchens

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#38459 - 05/12/10 04:43 AM Re: Demonic possession [Re: Mordred]
Doomsage680 Offline
member


Registered: 10/01/09
Posts: 111
Loc: NJ, USA
I've had my own experience with a woman of a succubus type personality. She was and is the most interesting woman I have ever known.

When I got to college I encountered many different women, and coming from a private school I was excited for a future of people who don't all know each other well. I met a very goth, very attractive and alluring asian girl who despite an accent knew english perfectly. We spoke briefly but I somewhat hoped to see her around.

Somehow I did see her near my dorm and got to talking, and I ran into her again in the early days of signing up for classes. She always had this darkness about her, but she was so dam interesting it didn't deter me one bit.

I started dating this other girl who actually knew her, I was an idiot who rushed into a relationship, and was still friends with the asian girl while dating, though we barely saw each other during that time. I ended the relationship quickly because we had very different expectations of it, and continuing was a disservice to both of us.

A few days later, me and the alluring asian girl were talking and she spoke of her boyfriend back home of 2 years. She talked about how she never ended the relationship when she left for college, though she knew she should have. She wasn't strong enough. I sympathized with the situation but I wanted what I wanted. After much subtle flirtation(this girl is ice cold and hard to read) I made a move and it turned out she was indeed interested in me as a friend with benefits. There started a very fun relationship, as not only was she beautiful and interesting, but genuinely understood me.

It's hard to not feel like a man when you're buying more condoms because you ran out of the ones you had.

The time we spent together was just perfect. We listened to metal, talked about philosophy and life, missed classes due to fun activity, there was little more I wanted.

We enjoyed our time together, and after a week and a half she became busy and was contacting me significantly less. I noticed it since it was an abrupt change, but tried not to think too much of it. After about a week of no contact I was feeling very empty inside. It wasn't even the physical aspect, more the emotional. I didn't have a ton of friends in the very beginning of school and now a major one was missing.

Time went on. I hadn't felt this cold and empty since I recovered from depression. Not that it was as intense; nothing will ever come close to the dark self-hatred and sadness that I experienced in highschool; but it was quite rough, and no matter what I did I could not feel better about life. There was almost no contact at all from her, whether it was texts or facebook.

A few weeks later she told me it was only because she was busy. But things didn't change, and sadness continued. A few weeks after that, I asked her if it was because I had been getting too emotionally attached. She said she just made the excuse about being busy to make me feel better about that.

I suppose the proof is in the pain. I didn't think I loved her or anything, but I did kind of want to date her. She was too amazing to pass up. She's really intelligent, really independent, really pretty, and she was fucking me. Pardon me for wanting it to stay that way, or wanting to get to know her better in addition.

But it was in her nature to not be attached to anyone or anything. I had gotten her to cheat on her boyfriend of 2 years, a guy who, a few days into our affair, she broke up with via cellphone the day before his birthday. Yea I was a satanist. But it's inhuman to not be able to feel that guys pain. Do I regret it? No. But that sucks.

He had even spoke with her where she had briefly mentioned me, and she noted he was particularly suspicious of me simply because he can read her. After the breakup he IM'd me on facebook asking how she was, and though I could see he was clearly in pain and caring for her, he was still feeling things out on whether I was the cause. I was not, but I was the catalyst. And I did a damn good job of lying and sounding concerned for him, and he bought it.

She had given me a cross that I could wear upside down, and I had proudly been wearing that around, answering curious observers that yes, I'm a Satanist, yes, I worship Satan(this is back in the day, fellas). And I must have subconsciously worn it because I liked what it represented. Me being me pure unadulterated and getting what I wanted. Unstoppable. Fearless. Satisfied with life and on my way to greater things.

I took it off and never wore it again when she stopped talking to me. I keep it around in a box with some other old trinkets of memorable value.

We're friends now, we talk on occasion, though it will never be to the same level we did. It's sad. She is a dark person, believe me, her past would haunt anyone, and she knew my past too. There was an understanding that I doubt I can have with most people, and it's gone now.

What's funny is she's probably more of a Satanist than I am. I think by birth, unlike me, at least somewhat. She is that enigmatic uncontainable darkness that none can fathom. I've told her that she inspires me and horrifies me simultaneously. I'm always drawn to women with power. We always want what we can't have.

I've moved on, but times when something reminds me of her or of how we were, I wonder what I might have done to change things.

Nothing. It was going to happen. I was going to learn that lesson. The depth of those scars taught me well. I wrote a great song about it too. I always valued pain for it's ability to make art.


This is text message heart break, a death sentence heart-ache
I'm left guessing why I feel so fucking far away/
It's gonna be a hard day, tearing at the heart of me
Like I lost a friend, like I lost a fucking part of me/

Emotions make you do crazy things, hard to control
I always want'em till I have'em then they make me cold/
I try to limit my involvement with those around me
but No Man's an Island, this Ocean is going to Drown me/
_________________________
"I who have nothing but the comfort of my sins"
- Vinny Paz

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#38463 - 05/12/10 10:04 AM Re: Demonic possession [Re: Doomsage680]
Demon Heretic666 Offline
stranger


Registered: 01/21/10
Posts: 30
Loc: Missouri
Fascinating stories from both the poster and the replier, Doomsage.

I for one, do beleive you, Mmatraus, as I deal with these kind of things myself. A point here that I would like to make is that some posessions are willing. We seek out a demonic force that we want in our lives nad do enter a trance to find what we seek. This could indeed be why she was in the trance in the first place. I myself have sought out my own force, and it was an interesting journey, to say the least.

It is not unusual for a woman to want a force such as the one she had, for there is a feeling of power in it, and speaking from experience, it is enjoyable, though only for the woman. It's a power thing.

The way you wrote your experience though is rather compelling. Being a writer myself, I say you could publish this if you were to lengthen it. Very powerful, friend.
_________________________
Too long the dead hand has been permitted to sterilize living thought!

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#38473 - 05/12/10 03:20 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: Demon Heretic666]
mmatraus Offline
stranger


Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 13
Loc: Tennessee
I wrote a true happening concerning a remarkable woman not really considering if it would be believed or not but am pleased that some can see beyond their exsistance in this mundane life we lead on this earth.
The lady was a creature of the dark who thrived on mysterious prdictions and prphacies that from my view point were a truth most people including her own family found hard to swallow. She spoke of things about myself that no one knew but me and had a dark presence to them that would mystify the most deep thinking religious minds. She was a lady who knew her mind and could basically look into others minds just through their character.
I wanted to show that there is another world that most just scratch the survice of if even if they are of a mind to be able to do that much.
One spoke of ghost so I guess my question would be have you ever seen God or the Devil, or any angle, or a demon other then your ex-wife. No I bet not but we believe in them so if someone does see an unatural being of any sort shouldn't we give them the benefit of the doubt?
Admittedly it takes a certain frame of mind, a cercumstance, or an external method to maybe produce such a sighting but I go back to the boy lost in the north woods overnight and had surely froxe to death they thought. That was until he showed up at the door of his home talking about the man who led him there. When aslked who the man was he pointed to a picture of John F. Kennedy hanging on the wall. This was years after his assisnation.
Believe what you will but always keep and open mind.

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#38476 - 05/12/10 04:10 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: mmatraus]
Dimitri Offline
stalker


Registered: 07/13/08
Posts: 3151
What has been told here is no demonic possession, no "dark force" or other "creature from the dark". It just is sexual attraction to another person from a different gender whom you (and doomsage) are wanting to fuck and did/didn't manage to.

Quit the supernatural stupidity and simply admit you wanted a good fuck, or are missing it.
And if you really want to tell this story, go and start writing it in a book-format. You might gain something from it..
_________________________
Ut vivat, crescat et floreat

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#38477 - 05/12/10 04:16 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: mmatraus]
Room 101 Offline
member


Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 262
Loc: Scotland
I call bullshit.

This form of Satanism skirts dangerously close to Christianity.

Spirits and nonsense.

Like 6 and Maw say, write a book, you might sell a few copies.
_________________________
"Nothing is your own except the few cubic centimeters inside your skull." - George Orwell (1984)

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#38485 - 05/12/10 09:51 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: Room 101]
Nemesis Offline
senior member


Registered: 09/01/07
Posts: 2175
Loc: US
No ghost with any taste would buy her new ghost clothes at JC Penney's. My God, if she could waft in and out of the air conditioning ducts, you'd think she'd at LEAST stop by Macy's or Neiman Marcus and find some tasteful threads.

Sounds to me like you were so hung up on this chick because she was an epic lay and when she married another man and turned normal, you thought something MUST have been wrong with her.

Please put breaks between your paragraphs. That long block of solid text is very difficult on the eyes.
_________________________
Nothing is sacred.

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#38486 - 05/12/10 10:43 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: Room 101]
ta2zz Offline
veteran member


Registered: 08/28/07
Posts: 1552
Loc: Connecticut

I didn't see any mention of any form of Satanism here? Whose ageist idea was it to ask someone to contribute solely based on the number of times they have circled the sun?

I sit on the fence on this one maybe they are 71 as an old Internet post under the same nick puts the age right. But being who I am I also know that this could be nothing but a very elaborate intelligent hoax by a new type of Satanic forum troll.

Other than that we know nothing of this person. Mention of this mundane existence led on earth suggests beliefs far different than my own.

~T~
_________________________
We are the music makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams. ~Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy

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#38488 - 05/12/10 11:36 PM Re: Demonic possession [Re: ta2zz]
Doomsage680 Offline
member


Registered: 10/01/09
Posts: 111
Loc: NJ, USA
I want to clarify in case anyone was unsure that I do not consider anything supernatural about the girl I was with. By darkness, I mean a dark personality, maybe even a sense of something dark by her personality and how she dresses and body language, and of course I have moved on.
I certainly don't suggest any factor was involved in this relationship other than natural and understandable(or somewhat understandable) causes. I'm not hung up on it any more, I just felt that the story I had was a very similar and relevant contribution when it comes to women of a certain personality. They have a certain affect on your life if you come across them simply because they are complex and powerful. We always want what is powerful and what we don't fully understand, but this is human nature.

However the girl I was involved with is very different from the one described here, in that she is not nearly as manipulative, not malicious or sinister the way the other woman seems to have been described, and does not herself believe in the supernatural or anything of the sort. But she does like a similar kind of "witch" image that many people notice. And of course, I am a strong Atheist.


Sir, if you sincerely believe all you have described, I hope you are able to move on and have meaningful relationships after her affect on you. Good luck.
_________________________
"I who have nothing but the comfort of my sins"
- Vinny Paz

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