Although I received my primary education at a Catholic school, I had no use for God, Jesus, or Virgin Mary.
I first became interested in Satan during the Satanic Panic. Yes, that special time when “breeders” infested the afternoon talk show circuit and Bob Larson ruled the airwaves. I know those days were particularly unpleasant for some of you, but it provided much mystery and imagery for a portion of the youth of the day. There was an aura of restrained fear throughout my community as the urban myth of Satanists quietly taking over America provided a much needed scapegoat for incompetent parents,sex deprived teachers, and Reagan conservatives.
I still remember watching Geraldo’s Satanism Special with one hand on the remote ready to flip the channel if anything particularly terrifying occurred, while simultaneously being attracted to the imagery and the strange guests present. At that time, I saw Satan as an alluring mystery that begged further exploration.
I eventually picked up a copy of the Satanic Bible and found that it just contained common sense. I thought Satanic ritual was downright dumb but decided to give it a try anyway. I used Halloween props for my first rituals and got some interesting results. I began to use Satan as a symbol to represent myself. I just saw Satan as me.
In the years that followed, my perception of Satan changed to Satan as a metaphor for the highest and best in me. This was useful for a time as I faced a series of personal trials.
Then Satan became a symbol for the forces of the subconscious mind and it was useful as a tool to dip into the dark pool of self.
More recently, I started to refer to Satan as a metaphor for the unified self, composed of the perceiver and perceived.
When I was a budding Satanist, it was me against the world. Now, the world is me as well as my playground.
Satan is the symbol I identify with that I feel best captures the concept of the creative universe that is the psyche of the individual Satanist.
seeker of the mysteries ......