Page all of 2 12>
Topic Options
#40470 - 07/19/10 06:16 AM The Voice of Satanism
Conrad Offline
Banned
stranger


Registered: 10/04/09
Posts: 9
I don't really know if anyone here will find this useful or not...



The Voice of Satanism
By Grand Magister Blackwood


Ebook, PDF Format

Free download: http://www.lulu.com/product/ebook/the-voice-of-satanism/11784258

Satan is returning! Are you ready? He spoke to me informing me he was coming in 2012 to purge the earth from all fake Satanists who give him a bad name! Are you ready for the great cleansing? Are you ready to witness our religion be washed clean from fakers? Come all you under my protective wing, for I and Father Satan are one. With the success of my first book, the prophesied New World Satanic Bible, I have written another, MORE Satanic Bible, which we shall call "The Voice of Satanism", for I am the world renounded Global Leader of all Satanism. My first book has made me the recognized Black Pope around the world. My fame has opened many doors for me, as many of you have surely noticed, for I have been on many a cable programme promoting Satanism and prophesying the return of Satan our Sumerian King! So sit back, behold, and be amazed! For I am the voice of the dark truth! The voice of Satanism.

Top
#40471 - 07/19/10 07:57 AM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Conrad]
Morgan Moderator Offline
senior member


Registered: 08/29/07
Posts: 2304
Loc: New York City
Lol, thanks, I needed a laugh this morning.

Shit, Satan talks to him, God talks to Bush. At least I recognize the voice in my head is my own.

Global Leader, Black Pope, my what an active fantasy life he has.

Whatever, if Satan shows up, he owes me a beer.

The great cleansing, shit is Satan opening a laundry mat/car wash?

Morgan
_________________________
Courage Conquering Fear
Fuck em if they can't take a joke
Don't Like What I Say, Kiss My Ass.


Top
#40472 - 07/19/10 08:07 AM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Morgan]
TV is God Offline
member


Registered: 08/11/08
Posts: 199
Loc: The Cornhole
So let me get this straight....

In 2012 Satan is coming to kill "fake" satanists. So people are supposed to see that all Satanists have been killed and then assume it's Satan's doing? I also dig the MORE Satanic Bible. Satanic Bible 2: Judgment Day.

But who am I to judge the ever famous world recognized black pope.. uhh who? Oh the guy who puts free books on lulu? Oh that world recognized ever famous black pope.
_________________________
Laugh and the world laughs with you. Weep and you weep alone.

Top
#40484 - 07/19/10 12:15 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: TV is God]
Dan_Dread Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/08/08
Posts: 2010
Loc: Vancouver, Canada
All hail blackwood! The true dark lard of Satanism!

I don't see YOU saving up to buy Satan a house when he returns?

To paraphrase one of my favourite musical artists, '3 shades of crazy is where he comes from'.
_________________________


Top
#40491 - 07/19/10 02:58 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Conrad]
6Satan6Archist6 Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/16/08
Posts: 2233
Loc: Oregon
Is that fat fuck still alive? Damn, I thought for sure he would have killed himself by now. Maybe I should try and seek him out online again. Many of good, cheap laughs came from me telling him what I thought about him and his "followers" and him trying in vain to defend himself. What a douche-bag.
_________________________
Ultimate Satanic Bad Ass of Ultimate Satanic Bad Assery PhD Esq. LLC Inc.^∞ DCLXVI°

Top
#40492 - 07/19/10 02:59 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Conrad]
Diavolo Moderator Offline
Moderator
stalker


Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 3781
 Quote:
I was amazed and captivated by his every word. He was so focused on his train of thought that a pile of cigarette ashes had fallen in the cleavage of his beautiful soft man boobs.
Grand Magister Blackwood had a thyroid problem ever since he was a child which effected his weight and gave him breast. But the Black Pope of Satanism was far from fat. For he had a Solo Flex gym and a Thigh Master right in his truck’s cabin, which he regularly worked out on every other month.


I almost feel sorry for the guy. Almost. Keep up the good work. ;\)

D.

Top
#40493 - 07/19/10 03:05 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Conrad]
Fnord Offline
active member


Registered: 01/11/10
Posts: 718
Loc: Texas
 Originally Posted By: Conrad
I don't really know if anyone here will find this useful or not...


For myself, most definitely not.

I'd love for you to come back and make a post relative to its importance to you though.

Also, if you have a moment, can you tell me what 'renounded' means? I don't want to miss out on anything. Thanks!
_________________________
Scratching Peace Symbols on Your Tombstone

Top
#40511 - 07/19/10 05:35 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Fnord]
ceruleansteel Offline
member


Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 549
Did I miss something?

I took this entire thing as just a way to make fun of everyone, Christian and Satanist alike.

Surely this guy isn't trying to be serious, and surely ya'll aren't thinking he is...

Top
#40512 - 07/19/10 05:39 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: ceruleansteel]
Dan_Dread Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/08/08
Posts: 2010
Loc: Vancouver, Canada
 Originally Posted By: ceruleansteel
Did I miss something?

I took this entire thing as just a way to make fun of everyone, Christian and Satanist alike.

Surely this guy isn't trying to be serious, and surely ya'll aren't thinking he is...


Blackwood? Oh he is dead serious.

If he is a troll he is the most dedicated and devoted troll of all time, as he has been doing this devil worshipping schtick for decades now.
_________________________


Top
#40514 - 07/19/10 05:53 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Dan_Dread]
ceruleansteel Offline
member


Registered: 10/15/07
Posts: 549
If this were a real book I would own it simply because reading it was some damn good comedy.

How can he possibly be serious? He effectively mocks both sides of the fence and all players, including himself, in damn near every paragraph. And the lackey-intro was just as hilarious.

Top
#40515 - 07/19/10 06:03 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: ceruleansteel]
Caladrius Offline
member


Registered: 07/25/09
Posts: 159
Loc: SoCal
 Originally Posted By: ceruleansteel


How can he possibly be serious?


Oh Bitchwood is very serious like Dan says. Prolly has a brain tumor made of trans fat in his frontal lobe somewhere.

But he's serious about his beliefs [insane beliefs] enough to stay in character on national television. Unbeknownst to anyone who cares, Blubberwood did appear on the History channel and he'll be on Coast to Coast soon talking about Satan's return. You can watch his cameo in this youtube which shows how serious/retarded he is. He appears at time mark 5:36 --->

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HjTvkYJbYQ8

Enjoy \:\)


Edited by Caladrius (07/19/10 06:04 PM)
_________________________
O9A

Top
#40517 - 07/19/10 06:05 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: ceruleansteel]
Dan_Dread Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/08/08
Posts: 2010
Loc: Vancouver, Canada
Oh, I don't know about the PDF. I know some self described ONA types have been making it their job to troll this guy, and I actually have heard about a fake Satanic Bible (complete with homoerotica). I have yet to care enough to track either his actual book nor the mock up, nor do I know which is linked here.

Blackwood is a real guy though, working hard to buy Satan a house to live in for his inevitable return.
_________________________


Top
#40518 - 07/19/10 06:14 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Dan_Dread]
Jake999 Offline
senior member


Registered: 11/02/08
Posts: 2174
There are those for whom the term BATSHIT was made. Blackwood definitely fills the bill. Although one has to give him credit for consitency, however batshit crazy he might be, rather than the wishy-washy "ala carte satanists" who can't concretize their own beliefs, so they pick and choose, deciding that whatever they can warp, wedge or otherwise mutate in to some semblance of belief is "true Satanism." In that, I'd prefer the openly batshit crazy Blackwood.
_________________________
Bury your dead, pick up your weapon and soldier on.


Top
#40520 - 07/19/10 06:19 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Dan_Dread]
Draculesti Offline
member


Registered: 09/18/07
Posts: 279
Loc: Rockville, Maryland
 Quote:
Blackwood is a real guy though, working hard to buy Satan a house to live in for his inevitable return.


Sounds like he's gone the evangelical route.

"Satan needs YOUR money to build his house, which I will humbly live in and take care of until his return. Oh, and Satan would like a Lexus, too. And the unholiest of Rolexes. HAIL SATAN!!!"
_________________________
The Holy Trinity: Me, Myself, and I.

Homo Homini Lupus

Top
#40521 - 07/19/10 06:19 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Jake999]
Dan_Dread Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/08/08
Posts: 2010
Loc: Vancouver, Canada
You know, Jake..I have come to that conclusion as well. I'll take a serious devil worshipper like him over a wishy washy new agey type 'theistic Satanist' any day. I also tend to respect fundamentalist christians more than the more watered down varieties. There is something to be said for consistency for sure.
_________________________


Top
#40522 - 07/19/10 06:22 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Caladrius]
6Satan6Archist6 Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/16/08
Posts: 2233
Loc: Oregon
I remember seeing that snippet a little while back. I am still surprised they even allowed him on that show - even for as brief of an appearance as it was.

I've been watching a lot of "Penn and Teller's: Bullshit!" lately as the new season has been on (about damn time) and I think it would be funny if they tackled groups like Joy of Satan or Blackwood's Temple of Satan. Then again that would probably be giving credit where none is due.
_________________________
Ultimate Satanic Bad Ass of Ultimate Satanic Bad Assery PhD Esq. LLC Inc.^∞ DCLXVI°

Top
#40524 - 07/19/10 06:27 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: 6Satan6Archist6]
Caladrius Offline
member


Registered: 07/25/09
Posts: 159
Loc: SoCal
 Originally Posted By: 6Satan6Archist6
I remember seeing that snippet a little while back. I am still surprised they even allowed him on that show - even for as brief of an appearance as it was.

I've been watching a lot of "Penn and Teller's: Bullshit!" lately as the new season has been on (about damn time) and I think it would be funny if they tackled groups like Joy of Satan or Blackwood's Temple of Satan. Then again that would probably be giving credit where none is due.


Hi 6,

I think the show producers just used Blackwood as a "tool." The show was this pseudo-journalist type documentary on how the "Anti-Christ" is going to return in 2012 because Nostradamus predicted it. And it looks like Blackwood was the only tool in Satanism that believes this BS \:\)

Anyways, Penn & Teller would be neck deep in shit if they took on the JoS or Blackwood lmao.


Edited by Caladrius (07/19/10 06:28 PM)
_________________________
O9A

Top
#40525 - 07/19/10 06:30 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Caladrius]
6Satan6Archist6 Offline
senior member


Registered: 10/16/08
Posts: 2233
Loc: Oregon
 Quote:
And it looks like Blackwood was the only tool in Satanism that believes this BS


Yeah, that same thought came to me right after I posted.
_________________________
Ultimate Satanic Bad Ass of Ultimate Satanic Bad Assery PhD Esq. LLC Inc.^∞ DCLXVI°

Top
#40526 - 07/19/10 09:06 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: 6Satan6Archist6]
felixgarnet Offline
active member


Registered: 10/17/09
Posts: 620
Loc: UK
 Originally Posted By: 6Satan6Archist6
Is that fat fuck still alive? Damn, I thought for sure he would have killed himself by now. Maybe I should try and seek him out online again. Many of good, cheap laughs came from me telling him what I thought about him and his "followers" and him trying in vain to defend himself. What a douche-bag.


HAHAHAHA!!!! THAT'S the guy I was trying to recall the name of in chat the other night! Dear God, I actually cried laughing the first time I read his "interview" with himself playing the parts of both disciple and Satanic Master. The idea that his corpulence is actually a sort of occult musculature caused by his need to buffer himself against interaction with the physical plane is nothing short of genius.
How sure are we that his whole persona isn't an elaborate spoof, anyway? Surely he can't be serious?
Oh, wait . . .
_________________________
"Here's to Artifice!" - Anton Szandor LaVey.

Top
#40558 - 07/20/10 05:05 PM Re: The Voice of Satanism [Re: Caladrius]
The Zebu Offline
active member


Registered: 08/08/08
Posts: 1129
Loc: Orlando, FL
I wouldn't be surprised if they tried to pay Gilmore (or some other more prominent leader) a visit to see if they could get him to spout some entertaining drivel, but were probably let down after finding out he wasn't a raving loon with absurd apocalyptic fantasies.

Regarding the original post, this seems to be one of the many hoaxes made by trolls in the past year or so regarding Raspotnik. They're worth a laugh or two, but the real guy doesn't need anyone elses' help to make himself look like a retarded manchild. A look at his site is proof enough that people like him should stay far, far, away from society. Preferably in their aunt's basement.

The larger internet community seems ignorant of his antics, so I'm guessing that these parodies are the handiwork of ONA-related groups like the White Star Acception, who went batshit insane over some e-war involving Raspotnik claiming to be the "new leader" of the Order of Nine Angles... (in spite of not having the slightest bit of familiarity with their ideas, and continuing to use the same shallow reverse-Christian shit he's always done.)

I'm still not quite sure whether he or the JoS counts as the "bottom of the barrel" of folks that call themselves Satanists... at least the JoS has their own horde of teenage Slayer fans miming their idiocy on Youtube, whereas Raspotnik seems to be all alone in his little corner of the internet.

Poor little Grand Mighty Poo-bah Blackwood.

Top
Page all of 2 12>


Moderator:  fakepropht, Nemesis, SkaffenAmtiskaw, Morgan, Mercury_Templar, Woland, Bacchae, Diavolo, Asmedious, Fist 
Hop to:

Generated in 0.039 seconds of which 0.005 seconds were spent on 13 queries. Zlib compression disabled.