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#5939 - 03/19/08 07:00 PM I could really use some feedback please
StephanieRose333 Offline
lurker


Registered: 03/19/08
Posts: 2
Loc: Jersey
Last year I had something amazing and intense happen to me. It could have been a psychotic episode, as the doctors have told me, or it could mean much more.
Basically it started with some curiosity on my part. I was not raised with any religion but I had researched and learned about most major faiths. I wanted to see if the “devil” existed. I was more than doubtful so I figured there was no harm is testing the waters.
This will sound very corny and I felt foolish when I did it. I ran a hot bath, turned out the lights, and I had three candles burning. I relaxed in the hot water and dim lights. After a while I said out loud, “Satan, if you are real, show yourself to me. If you do, I will follow you.” I blew out the candles and went to bed.
A couple days later I found myself in a psyche hospital (not the first time). I was talking with other patients and everything was normal when suddenly I heard telepathically “go to your room” so I excused myself and went to my room. Then I heard “start writing” so I did. I have notebooks full of writings that I did not write, it was all channeled through me. They told that they were demons.
Over the next eleven days strange things went on. I believe I was possessed, willingly so. My pupils were huge, to the point where my eyes looked almost completely black. I literally felt like I was on drugs. I had severe headaches every morning. Everything looked surreal. And I constantly heard these demons talking to me, and I wrote most of it down. I can’t explain it, but it was very intense and bizarre.
One night I couldn’t sleep and I was so upset because I didn’t believe in the devil so how could demons be real? I was so confused (still am actually). I asked the demons to leave me alone, and next morning they were all gone. Now, I know this sounds stupid and you can rationalize it all but if you lived it like I did, you wouldn’t be able to do that so easily.
So what do I believe? I really don’t know. I know that what I went through felt as real as my own flesh. Even if the devil exists, which I’m pretty convinced he does, I don’t think that its how the Bible says it is. The demons told me a lot of different things that don’t go along with what the Bible teaches. The most important thing they told me is that, “its not over”.
I would really like some feedback about this, thank you.

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#5941 - 03/19/08 07:17 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
rob_church Offline
member


Registered: 11/02/07
Posts: 194
Loc: alberta , canada
in the name of jebus i command you to leave this tormented soul lol /me splash holy water on stephanie/emilyrose face

that will be 5 bucks at the door thank you come agian:)
_________________________
http://www.sintheticgraphics.com

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#5942 - 03/19/08 07:42 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
Asmedious Moderator Offline
Moderator
senior member


Registered: 09/02/07
Posts: 1738
Loc: New York
 Quote:
I would really like some feedback about this, thank you.


 Quote:
A couple days later I found myself in a psyche hospital (not the first time).


It's just that simple.
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"The first order of government is the protection of its citizens right to be left alone."

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#5943 - 03/19/08 08:21 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: Asmedious]
Xutech Offline
stranger


Registered: 03/18/08
Posts: 34
Loc: Australia
Follow your course of medication.
Do not construct stories to troll forums.

One or the other of these applies to you.

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#5944 - 03/19/08 08:26 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
L Fern Tej Offline
pledge


Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 65
Loc: Las Vegas, NV. (u.s.)
sounds like you have your self a top box-office hit.

also i see what you did there, with the name...Emily Rose/ Stephanie Rose. clever.


Edited by L Fern Tej (03/19/08 08:27 PM)

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#5954 - 03/19/08 08:58 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: L Fern Tej]
LUCIFERIFIC Offline
active member


Registered: 02/01/08
Posts: 629
Loc: CA
koo-koo koo-koo

I was watching this anthropological documentary on the Aymara. There was this guy in the documentary that was hearing voices of his ancestors talking to him. It got worse for him over the course of some months and he couldn't sleep because they would stop talking to him. He jumped off a cliff.

Medication won't help. Jump...
_________________________
Lux Ex Tenebris
Lux Lucet Ex Orientis


~~352~~


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#5958 - 03/19/08 10:04 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: LUCIFERIFIC]
97and107 Offline
member


Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 274
Loc: New Mexico
Oh demons are real, the ever shifting landscape of the mind is their hell, and they do hold their general form over the course of thousands of years, some being common to all humans by the general foundational functions and cellular memory we have buried deep down in there where darkness reigns....

I have no doubt you ignited some of them, Satan is a powerful archetype and lends some fantastic initiatory experiences, one of my favorite muses of all...just don't forget it's all in your head...and enjoy it.

The science of mind, ie via the Eastern disciplines will carry you through some of the hairier bends...most people are better off not unlocking these hidden potentials, as they can drive you insane to the point of not being able to function properly. That's where these yoga disciplines really shine for instance, and where Western medicine helps, but does not distill into something useful the experiences, same with Exorcism. Western approaches in general to *transcendence* are futile while Eastern approaches tend to embrace and transmute the influence accepting it naturally as a part of ourselves. You ride the tiger, instead of killing it...

These approaches don't always work though, and it's unfortunately true that most of the science o f mind as developed by Buddhist and Yoga schools has been lost and taken over by morons...

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#5974 - 03/20/08 01:06 AM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: L Fern Tej]
StephanieRose333 Offline
lurker


Registered: 03/19/08
Posts: 2
Loc: Jersey
 Originally Posted By: L Fern Tej
sounds like you have your self a top box-office hit.

also i see what you did there, with the name...Emily Rose/ Stephanie Rose. clever.


actully stephanie rose is my real name. im not making things up or playing games. i really went though this, real or not. and i think its very rude to post negative responses, if you have nothing constructive to tell me then please dont bother. i guess some people 'get off' by thinking to highly of themsleves....and for the record i am taking my meds

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#5979 - 03/20/08 04:49 AM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
morgoth Offline
stranger


Registered: 03/20/08
Posts: 12
Loc: Perth, Western Australia
Have you been tested for Paranoid Schizophrenia. I'm not making fun and I'm also not a Doctor, but some of the things you described happening to you may very well be P.S.
You stated that you were taking medication so I assume you've seen/seeing a Doctor, was P.S. something he talked to you about?
What ever the outcome, I hope things go well for you.

Remember: The mind(brain) is the most complex and powerful organism that exists.

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#5990 - 03/20/08 10:49 AM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
ta2zz Offline
veteran member


Registered: 08/28/07
Posts: 1552
Loc: Connecticut

 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333
actully stephanie rose is my real name. im not making things up or playing games. i really went though this, real or not.

So you say, remember if it is all in your head then yes you did go through it… Only you…

 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333
and i think its very rude to post negative responses, if you have nothing constructive to tell me then please dont bother.

Funny others have recently fought for tolerance and their version of what they deem constructive posting… Too bad the guy was an internet troll… Just because you do not hear the response you want do not consider it a non constructive post… There is a list of rules that Xear has posted remember this is his forum… There are moderators to police the forums remove offenders and lock threads that have reached their end…

Therefore your dislike of the responses you provoke with your story seem to be much like your demons, only yours…

 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333
i guess some people 'get off' by thinking to highly of themsleves....and for the record i am taking my meds

This is a Satanic forum dear… Most of us do not fit into the care bear fluffy Satanist mold… If you came here for hugs then perhaps it is simply a misunderstanding on your part…

Perhaps a read of The Satanic Bible may give you an idea of what you talk about and to whom you speak… This book was/is a primer for most here…

From a medical perspective if you live in New Jersey you might want to try to get a hookup with some of the great doctors at YALE medical in New Haven, Connecticut… What you describe may very well be seizures and the after effects…

Good Luck

~T~
_________________________
We are the music makers, And we are the dreamers of dreams. ~Arthur William Edgar O'Shaughnessy

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#5994 - 03/20/08 11:43 AM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: 97and107]
ballbreaker Offline
member


Registered: 09/04/07
Posts: 134
Loc: Toronto, Canada
 Quote:
Oh demons are real, the ever shifting landscape of the mind is their hell, and they do hold their general form over the course of thousands of years, some being common to all humans by the general foundational functions and cellular memory we have buried deep down in there where darkness reigns....


Sounds like a line out of a movie. Can you substantiate any of this with evidence or are you just talking out of your ass?

*sigh* I have this awful feeling that all this hocus pocus is going to come down to a "you are your own demon" cop out.

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#6008 - 03/20/08 01:42 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: ballbreaker]
TheMask Offline
member


Registered: 03/10/08
Posts: 130
I think that which happened to you may very well be possible, im quite religious myself so i wouldnt discard it as bullshit right away like some people here.
I have to agree with what 97and107 stated previously which is basically - Enjoy the ride. Reality tends to get boring sometimes so perhaps you should see it as a blessing rather then a curse. And after all, not that many people get to experience what you did.

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#6009 - 03/20/08 01:55 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: ballbreaker]
Xutech Offline
stranger


Registered: 03/18/08
Posts: 34
Loc: Australia
<Basically it started with some curiosity on my part. I was not raised with any religion but I had researched and learned about most major faiths. I wanted to see if the “devil” existed. I was more than doubtful so I figured there was no harm is testing the waters.>

Not a good project to begin with a history of mental illness and while on medication.

<After a while I said out loud, “Satan, if you are real, show yourself to me. If you do, I will follow you.” I blew out the candles and went to bed.>

If I invented a test to determine if the Tooth fairy was real, I wouldn't add that I would "serve" them.

<I don’t think that its how the Bible says it is. The demons told me a lot of different things that don’t go along with what the Bible teaches. The most important thing they told me is that, “its not over”.>

You claim to have not been aligned with any particular religious belief, and yet you refer, often, back to christianity.

<and i think its very rude to post negative responses, if you have nothing constructive to tell me then please dont bother.>

I think for the most part, we have. And to be honest, the only reason why we are is that either we are dealing with someone with a profound mental illness, or we are dealing with someone assembling an argument against Satanists for presentation to their friends, perhaps as a simple exercise in Trolling forums.

Either way, you have been given your advice. If I met you in person, I'd treat you like I would treat any other judgementally clouded dabbler with a penchant for sharing their various misfortunes.

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#6018 - 03/20/08 06:53 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: StephanieRose333]
L Fern Tej Offline
pledge


Registered: 12/11/07
Posts: 65
Loc: Las Vegas, NV. (u.s.)
 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333
actully stephanie rose is my real name. im not making things up or playing games. i really went though this,


and i'm Bill motherfucking Murray, nice to meet you.
that's the wonderful thing about the internet if it wasn't for the link to my myspace on my profile, i could be who ever i wanted to. and even then...that could be a fake myspace.

 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333

and i think its very rude to post negative responses, if you have nothing constructive to tell me then please dont bother.


what exactly are you getting at? why did you even "bother"
signing up for this forum? there was no advice given, because there is NO advice to give that your doctors wouldn't have already told you.
we can't diagnose you, we can't make the "demons" leave you alone, and i doubt anyone here can exorcise you.


 Originally Posted By: StephanieRose333
i guess some people 'get off' by thinking to highly of themsleves....and for the record i am taking my meds

well, i can't speak for everyone here, but i certainly do ;\)

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#6024 - 03/20/08 07:43 PM Re: I could really use some feedback please [Re: L Fern Tej]
rob_church Offline
member


Registered: 11/02/07
Posts: 194
Loc: alberta , canada
we can't diagnose you, we can't make the "demons" leave you alone, and i doubt anyone here can exorcise you.

look to the top post i totally exorcised her for a mere 5 dollars at that what a bargin:)
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http://www.sintheticgraphics.com

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